I have built my life in the construct of an unfolding fantasy.
I see myself as something more than I really am,
and then work to make that image a reality.

But if I project too far ahead, imagine too grand, I am overcome by anxiety.
And if I live too close to reality, I fall to depression.

Science fiction builds technical reality.
Fantasy is the foundation of our civilization.
Depression is the leading mental illness of our time.
Do civilizations collapse when they lose their vision for a better future?

In the space between I maintain my forward momentum–tumbling,
falling with arms outstretched, catching myself one leap at a time.

Too far. Not far enough. Stumble. Jump. Push forward. Pull back.

Reality check. Check-check.